• Chris Collins

I hate my thoughts, will you listen?



Over the last few weeks I have had a few disappointments and made a few mistakes. When I say a few, three in total over five weeks. (My brain loves to exaggerate things.) Why do I know it is three things in five weeks, because I kept thinking about these disappointments and mistakes, going over and over them.


Yes, despite the fact that I coach on personal resilience doesn't mean that I think differently to anyone else nor that I can stop negative thoughts coming to the forefront of my mind. What I do know however is that it is normal behaviour and by knowing this means that I can dismiss these negative thoughts as just that, thoughts.


Why am I telling you this, airing to the world that I have negative thoughts? Because I believe that it is important to normalise some of our negative behaviours which in turn might help others who feel the same way as I know that they are no alone or isolated.


Over recent times we have become disconnected from each other. Evolutionary, we are socially interactive creatures who have suddenly become isolated due mainly to advances in technology. When once we talked about our problems face-to-face we now send an e-message or simply keep it to ourselves.


If technology is the way forward, then perhaps we should start communicating our thoughts and emotions in e-messages. It may not be the best way that us baby-boomers deal with our negative thoughts and emotions but at least we can get younger generations talking about this stuff.


In my humble opinion, a high number of suicides amongst younger people (and sometimes older people) is due to their inability to handle disappointment which leads to guilt and regret as well as a reluctance to communicate their thoughts and emotions leads to feelings of isolation.


Where once we would talk to each other and share our experiences (good and bad) we now tend to keep silent for fear of ridicule or being ‘different’. We aren’t that different, none of us.

Talk more, share more, live more. Let’s talk to each other, let’s listen to each other. If it has to be through e-messages then so be it.


This post has been posted with permission from Lance Burdett from his blog at WARN International.

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